AsSoRtEd

This is a cool collection of some of my finest thoughts.

Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Munna Programmer

Apun Jaisey Tapore Ko Kiya Maloom
Saala Programing Kis Cheryaan Ka Naam Hai?
Copy Paste kar Key Apna Time Pass Hota Hai
Copy Paste Ka Kaam Milta Hai
Bas Apun Khush
Yeh Coding Ka Lafda Locha Kayko?
Arey Kayko?
Arey Kayko Rey?
Fir Ek Din Boley Tu Apun Ko Ek Project Mila
Yahoooooooooooo
Saala Apun Ka Khoopre Chakar Kah Gaya
Computer Key Sath DIL Saala Takar Kah Gaya
Apun Ko Laga Apun Ka Bera Paar Ho Gaya
Boley To Baap Saala Apun Ko Bhi Kaam Mil Gaya
Din Bhar Apun Computer Key Aagey
Koi Lafra Nahi Kuch Nahi
Teen Din Na Motey Sey Raada Na Patley Sey Pangaa
Bas Chup Chaap
Apun Ka Bero Loog Saala Dar Gaya
Bola Kiya Bey Munna Saala Tu Bhi Programmer Ban Gaya
Fir Ek Din Apun Ko Kaam Karta Dekh Lamba Bola
Yeh Munna! Kiya Coding Bana Reyla Hai Baap
Apun Ka Khoopre Satka
Lamboo Ko Pakra
Bola Idhar Aa Sahney Terey Ko Coding Seekahta Hoon
Saaley Ko Itna Sekahya Itna Sekahya
Abhi Tak Saala Forms Main Kacha Hai
Aur Aaj Tak Us Ka Forms Key Sath Chattis Ka Aakraa Hai
Samjha ?
Samjha Kiya ?
(Phir? Phir Kiya Howa?)
Fir Ek Din Apun Ney Coding Poora Kar Diya
Form Poora Kar Key Apun Ney Testing Ko Bhej Diya
Lagta Tha Ab Apun Ka Kaam Kahtam Ho Gaya
Par DTS Main Issues Dekh Key Saala Apun Dar Gaya
Apun Key Samney Tester Ney Mere Coding Main Kaye Galtiyan Nikale
Apun Ke Coding Ke Poore Wat Laga Daale
Apun Udarhich Kahra Tha
Par Apun Kuch Nahi Bola
Kayko Boleyga?
Kayko?
Saala Ek, Ek Kaam Kiya Tha
Us Main Bhi Itney Bugs
Par Apun Ek Aansoo Bhi Nahi Rooya
Kayko Royega?
Kayko?
Saala Apun Hij Yeeda Tha Na
Agley Din Sey Phir Wahi Life Chalo
Wahi Copy Paste Karna
Wahi Messages
Saala Itna Mails Forward Kiya
Itna Mails Forward Kiya
Loog Samjhey Mail Server Down Ho Gaya
Bhoolney Ka Hai Bhoolney Ka Hai
Par Kiya Karey Ga
Training Ley Key Bhi Jab Kaam Nahi Milta Hai
Haan Thora Bore Howa Par Chalta Hai
(Phir ? Phir Kiya Howa?)
Fir
Fir Kiya
Agley Din Apun Ko Ek Aur Project Mila
Saala Apun Ka Khoopre Phir Chakkar Kah Gaya
Computer Key Sath DIL Saala Phir Takkar Kah Gaya
Shaapak
Ho Ho Ho Hooooooooo
Ho Ho Ho Hooooooooo

A Management Story Story

A Management Story Story # 1 It`s a fine sunny day in the forest and a lion is sitting outside his cave, lying lazily in the sun. Along comes a fox, out on a walk. Fox: "Do you know the time, because my watch is broken" Lion: "Oh, I can easily fix the watch for you" Fox: "Hmm... But it`s a very complicated mechanism, and your big claws will only destroy it even more" Lion: "Oh no, give it to me, and it will be fixed" Fox: "That`s ridiculous! Any fool knows that lazy lions with great claws cannot fix complicated watches" Lion: "Sure they do, give it to me and it will be fixed" The lion disappears into his cave, and after a while he comes back with the watch which is running perfectly. The fox is impressed, and the lion continues to lie lazily in
the sun, looking very pleased with himself. Soon a wolf comes along and stops to watch the lazy lion in the sun. Wolf: "Can I come and watch TV tonight with you, because mine is broken" Lion: "Oh, I can easily fix your TV for you" Wolf: "You don`t expect me to believe such rubbish, do you? There is no way that a lazy lion with big claws can fix a complicated TV" Lion: "No problem. Do you want to try it?" The lion goes into his cave, and after a while comes back with a perfectly fixed TV. The wolf goes away happily and amazed. Scene : Inside the lion`s cave. In one corner are half a dozen small and intelligent looking rabbits who are busily doing very complicated work with very detailed instruments. In the other corner lies a huge lion looking very pleased with himself.

Moral : IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY A MANAGER IS FAMOUS; LOOK AT THE WORK OF HIS SUBORDINATES. Management Lesson In the context of the working world :
IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY SOMEONE UNDESERVED IS PROMOTED; LOOK AT THE WORK OF HIS SUBORDINATES.


Story # 2 It`s a fine sunny day in the forest and a rabbit is sitting outside his burrow, tippy-tapping on his typewriter.. Along comes a fox, out for a walk. Fox: "What are you working on?" Rabbit: "My thesis." Fox: "Hmm... What is it about?" Rabbit: "Oh, I`m writing about how rabbits eat foxes." Fox: "That`s ridiculous ! Any fool knows that rabbits
don`t eat foxes!" Rabbit: "Come with me and I`ll show you!" They both disappear into the rabbit`s burrow. After few minutes, gnawing on a fox bone, the rabbit returns to his typewriter and resumes typing. Soon a wolf comes along and stops to watch the hardworking rabbit. Wolf: "What`s that you are writing?" Rabbit: "I`m doing a thesis on how rabbits eat wolves." Wolf: "you don`t expect to get such rubbish published, do you?" Rabbit: "No problem. Do you want to see why?" The rabbit and the wolf go into the burrow and again the rabbit returns by himself, after a few minutes, and goes back to typing. Finally a bear comes along and asks, "What are you doing? Rabbit: "I`m doing a thesis on how rabbits eat bears." Bear: "Well that`s absurd ! " Rabbit: "Come into my home and I`ll show you" Scene : As they enter the burrow, the rabbit introduces the bear to the lion.

Moral:
IT DOESN`T MATTER HOW SILLY YOUR THESIS TOPIC IS; WHAT MATTERS IS WHOM YOU HAVE AS A
SUPERVISOR. In the context of the working world: IT DOESN`T MATTER HOW BAD YOUR PERFORMANCE IS; WHAT MATTERS IS WHETHER YOUR BOSS LIKES YOU OR NOT

A Management Story Story

# 1 It`s a fine sunny day in the forest and a lion is sitting outside his cave, lying lazily in the sun. Along comes a fox, out on a walk. Fox: "Do you know the time, because my watch is broken" Lion: "Oh, I can easily fix the watch for you" Fox: "Hmm... But it`s a very complicated mechanism, and your big claws will only destroy it even more" Lion: "Oh no, give it to me, and it will be fixed" Fox: "That`s ridiculous! Any fool knows that lazy lions with great claws cannot fix complicated watches" Lion: "Sure they do, give it to me and it will be fixed" The lion disappears into his cave, and after a while he comes back with the watch which is running perfectly. The fox is impressed, and the lion continues to lie lazily in
the sun, looking very pleased with himself. Soon a wolf comes along and stops to watch the lazy lion in the sun. Wolf: "Can I come and watch TV tonight with you, because mine is broken" Lion: "Oh, I can easily fix your TV for you" Wolf: "You don`t expect me to believe such rubbish, do you? There is no way that a lazy lion with big claws can fix a complicated TV" Lion: "No problem. Do you want to try it?" The lion goes into his cave, and after a while comes back with a perfectly fixed TV. The wolf goes away happily and amazed. Scene : Inside the lion`s cave. In one corner are half a dozen small and intelligent looking rabbits who are busily doing very complicated work with very detailed instruments. In the other corner lies a huge lion looking very pleased with himself.


Moral : IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY A MANAGER IS FAMOUS; LOOK AT THE WORK OF HIS SUBORDINATES.

Management Lesson In the context of the working world :
IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHY SOMEONE UNDESERVED IS PROMOTED; LOOK AT THE WORK OF HIS SUBORDINATES.


Story # 2 It`s a fine sunny day in the forest and a rabbit is sitting outside his burrow, tippy-tapping on his typewriter.. Along comes a fox, out for a walk. Fox: "What are you working on?" Rabbit: "My thesis." Fox: "Hmm... What is it about?" Rabbit: "Oh, I`m writing about how rabbits eat foxes." Fox: "That`s ridiculous ! Any fool knows that rabbits
don`t eat foxes!" Rabbit: "Come with me and I`ll show you!" They both disappear into the rabbit`s burrow. After few minutes, gnawing on a fox bone, the rabbit returns to his typewriter and resumes typing. Soon a wolf comes along and stops to watch the hardworking rabbit. Wolf: "What`s that you are writing?" Rabbit: "I`m doing a thesis on how rabbits eat wolves." Wolf: "you don`t expect to get such rubbish published, do you?" Rabbit: "No problem. Do you want to see why?" The rabbit and the wolf go into the burrow and again the rabbit returns by himself, after a few minutes, and goes back to typing. Finally a bear comes along and asks, "What are you doing? Rabbit: "I`m doing a thesis on how rabbits eat bears." Bear: "Well that`s absurd ! " Rabbit: "Come into my home and I`ll show you" Scene : As they enter the burrow, the rabbit introduces the bear to the lion.

Moral: IT DOESN`T MATTER HOW SILLY YOUR THESIS TOPIC IS; WHAT MATTERS IS WHOM YOU HAVE AS A SUPERVISOR. In the context of the working world: IT DOESN`T MATTER HOW BAD YOUR PERFORMANCE IS; WHAT MATTERS IS WHETHER YOUR BOSS LIKES YOU OR NOT

Friday, December 21, 2007

Management Lessons

LESSON 1 A junior manager, a senior manager and their boss are on their way to a meeting. On their way through a park, they come across a wonder lamp. They rub the lamp and a ghost appears.
The ghost says, 'Normally, one is granted three wishes but as you are three, I will allow one wish each'

So the eager senior manager shouted, 'I want the first wish. I want to be in the Bahamas, on a fast boat and have no worries.' Pfufffff and he was gone.

Now the junior manager could not keep quiet and shouted 'I want to be in Florida with beautiful girls, plenty of food and cocktails.'
Pfufffff, and he Was also gone.

The boss calmly said, 'I want these two idiots back in the office after lunch at 12.35pm.'


*MORAL OF THE STORY IS: 'ALWAYS ALLOW THE BOSSES TO SPEAK FIRST'*

LESSON 2
Standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.
'Listen,' said the CEO, 'this is a very sensitive and important document and my secretary has left. Can you make this thing work?'

'Certainly,' said the young executive. He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.

'Excellent, excellent!' said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the shredder machine. 'I just need one copy.'

*LESSON II - NEVER, NEVER ASSUME THAT YOUR BOSS KNOWS EVERYTHING.*

LESSON 3
An American and Japanese were sitting on the plane on the way to LA
When the American turned to the Japanese and asked, 'What kind of -ese are you?'
The Japanese confused, replied, 'Sorry but I don't understand what you mean.'

The American repeated, 'What kind of -ese are you?' Again, the Japanese was confused over his question.
The American, now irritated, then yelled, 'What kind of -ese are you
....Are you a Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese! Etc...?'

The Japanese then replied, 'Oh, I am Japanese.' A while later the Japanese turned to the American and asked what kind of 'key' was he.

The American, frustrated, yelled, 'What do you mean what kind of
* kee'am I?!'

The Japanese said, 'Are you a Yankee, donkee, or monkee?'

*LESSON III - NEVER INSULT ANYONE.*

LESSON 4
There were these 4 guys, a Russian, a German, an American and a French,
who found this small genie bottle. When they rubbed the bottle, a genie appeared. Thankful that the 4 guys had released him out of the bottle, He said,
'Next to you all are 4 swimming pools, I will give each of you a wish.
When you run towards the pool and jump, you shout what you want the pool of water to become, then your wish will come true.'
The French wanted to start. He ran towards the pool, jumped and shouted 'WINE'. The pool immediately changed into a pool of wine. The Frenchman was so happy swimming and drinking from the pool.
Next is the Russian's turn, he did the same and shouted, 'VODKA' and immersed himself into a pool of vodka.

The German was next and he jumped and shouted, 'BEER'. He was so contented with his beer pool.

The last is the American. He was running towards the pool when suddenly he steps on a banana peel. He slipped towards the pool and shouted,
'SHIT!!!!!!!.........'


*LESSON IV - THINK TWICE BEFORE YOU SAY SOMETHING, BECAUSE SOMETIMES
ACCIDENTS DO HAPPEN.*

LESSON 5
The organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was in charge. Each organ took a turn to speak up:
Brain......... I should be in charge because I run all body functions.
Blood........ I should be in charge because I circulate oxygen for the brain.
Stomach... I should be in charge because I process food to the brain.
Legs......... I should be in charge because I take the brain where it wants to go.
Eyes......... I should be in charge because I let the brain see where it's going.
Asshole.....I should be in charge because I get rid of your waste.
All the other parts laughed so hard and this made the asshole very mad. To prove his point, the asshole immediately slammed tightly closed and stayed that way for 6 days, refusing to rid the body of any waste whatsoever.
Day 1 - Brain got a terrible headache and cried out for relief Day 2 -Stomach got bloated and began to ache terribly Day 3 - Legs got cramps and became unstable Day 4 - Eyes became watery and vision became blurred Day 5 - Blood became toxic and poisoned the body Day 6 -The other organs agreed to let the asshole be in charge.


*MORAL OF THE STORY: NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE, OR HOW IMPORTANT YOU THINK YOU ARE, YOU WILL FIND THAT IT IS ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE THAT IS IN CHARGE.*

U WILL DIE LAUGHING AT THIS ONE.

This is the ultimate ...you would almost die laughing!!!!

Due to the wayour Hindi was pronounced by the British and the Anglo Indians too,here Goes:

GANPAT-RAI Bihari ,(who really needs a job) is being interviewed byBritish, Colonel Smith
Col Smith: Haan toh Gaand Fat rahai (Ganpat-Rai)!!
Bihari: Nahi sir, jyada nahi!!
Col. Smith: Kya 'jyada nahi' bolta hai, tumhara application me likha Huahai Gand fat rahai.
Bihari : Theekh hai mai baap, likha hai to fat raha hoga.
Col. Smith: Tum Daily marata hai (tum delhi me rahta hai)??
Bihari : Nahi sir, kabhi kabhi!!
Col. Smith: Gand fatrahai, idhar aaoo, kya 'kabhi kabhi' boltahai?Tumhara application mein likha hua hai ki tum Daily marata hai.
Bihari : Theek hai mai bap, likha hai to marata honga.The Bihari was employed on one condition that he will do whateverCol.Smith's family asks him to do.
Col. Smith: Gand fatrahai!!
Ganpatrai : Ji maalik.
Col. Smith: Aaj tum ko 3 kaam karnee kaa haai
Ganpatrai : Hukum SarkaarCol. Smith: Tum pehla hamaari beti ko chodenga (drop her off)... baadmein hamaari biwi ko chodenga... aur uske baad mein hum ko chodenga.
Ganpatrai : Maaf karna Sarkaar, tumhari biwi aur beti to theek hai,lekinmain aap ko nahi choddh sakta.
Col.Smith: Gand fatrahai! Tum ko hum ko chodnaa padhega.
Ganpatrai : Nahi sarkaar aisa zulum naa kare.
Col. Smith: Gand fatrahai, agar tum hum ko nahi chod sakta to hum tumkonokri se nikaal denga.
Ganpatrai : Theek hai sarkaar ....jo hukum.After a few days there is no one except
Col.Smith's wife at home. She isalone in her bedroom. While wearing her bra she is unable to Tie theknot behind.So......
Wife: Gand fatrahai, idhar aaoo?
Ganpatrai : Ji Maalkin.
Wife: Gand fatrahai, hammara peeche se gaand maaro (gaanth maro-tie thebra knot).
Ganpatrai : Yeh kya keh rahi hai Maalkin??
Wife: Gand fatrahai, jaldi se gaand maaro hum ko late hota hai.
Ganpatrai : Nahi Nahi Maalkin. Agar maine aisa kiya to hum ko sarkarkacha kha jayenge.
Wife: Gand fatrahai, agar tumne jaldi se hamari gaand nahi maari to humtumko kacha kha jaayengi.
Ganpatrai : Theek hai maalkin. Jo hukum.Ganpatrai who has been frustrated by these Brits for a long time startslike a bull.Panic stricken the wife tries to turn and shouts:
Wife : GAND FATRAHAI, GAND FATRAHAI, GAND FATRAHAI !!!Ganpatrai :Memsaab...Gaand maarega to Gaand to phatega.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

How they named?

ABN AMRO- In the 1960s, the Nederlandse Handelmaatschappij (Dutch Trading Society; 1824) and the Twentsche Bank merged to form the Algemene Bank Nederland ( ABN; General Bank of the Netherlands). In 1966, the Amsterdamsche Bank and the Rotterdamsche Bank merged to form the Amro Bank. In 1991, ABN and Amro Bank merged to form ABN AMRO.

Accenture- Accent on the Future. Greater-than 'accent' over the logo's t points forward towards the future. The name Accenture was proposed by a company employee in Norwayas part of a internal name finding process (BrandStorming). Prior to January 1, 2001 the company was called Andersen Consulting.

Adidas- from the name of the founder Adolf (Adi) Dassler.

Adobe- came from name of the river Adobe Creek that ran behind the houses of founders John Warnock and Chuck Geschke .

AltaVista - Spanish for "high view".

Amazon.com - Founder Jeff Bezos renamed the company to Amazon (from the earlier name of Cadabra.com) after the world's most voluminous river, the Amazon. He saw the potential for a larger volume of sales in an online bookstore as opposed to the then prevalent bookstores. (Alternative: It is said that Jeff Bezos named his book store Amazon simply to cash in on the popularity of Yahoo at the time. Yahoo listed entries alphabetically, and thus Amazon would always appear above its competitors in the relevant categories it was listed in.)

AMD- Advanced Micro Devices.

Apache- The name was chosen from respect for the Native American Indian tribe of Apache (Indé), well-known for their superior skills in warfare strategy and their inexhaustible endurance. Secondarily, and more popularly (though incorrectly) accepted, it's considered a cute name that stuck: its founders got started by applying patches to code written for NCSA's httpd daemon. The result was 'a patchy' server â€" thus the name Apache.

Apple- for the favourite fruit of co-founder Steve Jobs and/or for the time he worked at an apple orchard. He was three months late in filing a name for the business, and he threatened to call his company Apple Computer if his colleagues didn't suggest a better name by 5 p.m. Apple's Macintosh is named after a popular variety of apple sold in the US. Apple also wanted to distance itself from the cold, unapproachable, complicated imagery created by the other computer companies at the time had names like IBM, NEC, DEC, ADPAC, Cincom, Dylakor, Input, Integral Systems, SAP, PSDI, Syncsort and Tesseract. The new company sought to reverse the entrenched view of computers in order to get people to use them at home. They looked for a name that was unlike the names of traditional computer companies, a name that also supported a brand positioning strategy that was to be perceived as simple, warm, human, approachable and different. Note: Apple had to get approval from the Beatle's Apple Corps to use the name 'Apple' and paid a one-time royalty of $100,000 to McIntosh Laboratory, Inc., a maker of high-end audio equipment, to use the derivative name 'Macintosh', known now as just 'Mac'.
AT&T- American Telephone and Telegraph Corporation officially changed its name to AT&T in the 1990s.
Bauknecht- Founded as an electrotechnical workshop in 1919 by Gottlob Bauknecht .
BBC- Stands for British Broadcasting Corporation.
BenQ - Bringing ENjoyment and Quality to life
Blaupunkt- Blaupunkt (Blue dot) was founded in 1923 under the name Ideal. Their core business was the manufacturing of headphones. If the headphones came through quality tests, the company would give the headphones a blue dot. The headphones quickly became known as the blue dots or blaue Punkte. The quality symbol would become a trademark, and the trademark would become the company name in 1938.
BMW- abbreviation of Bayerische Motoren Werke (Bavarian Motor Factories)
Borealis - The Northern Lights or Aurora Borealis, is the celestial phenomenon that features bursts of light in colourful patterns dancing across the night skies of the north. Borealis, inspired from the shining brilliance of the Northern Lights, was formed in 1994 out of the merger between two northern oil companies, Norway's Statoil and Finland's Neste.
BP - formerly British Petroleum, now "BP" (The slogan "Beyond Petroleum" has incorrectly been taken to refer to the company's new name following its rebranding effort in 2000).
BRAC - abbreviation for Bangladesh Rural Advancement Committee, world's largest NGO (non governmental organization). It works in development programs around the world.
Bridgestone- named after founder Shojiro Ishibashi. The surname Ishibashi (??) means "stone bridge", i.e. "bridge of stone".
Bull- Compagnie des machines Bull was founded in Paristo exploit the patents for punched card machines taken out by a Norwegian engineer, Fredrik Rosing Bull.
Cadillac - Cadillac was named after the 18th century French explorer Antoine Laumet de La Mothe , sieur de Cadillac, founder of Detroit, Michigan. Cadillac is a small town in the South of France.
Canon- Originally (1933) Precision Optical Instruments Laboratory the new name (1935) derived from the name of the company's first camera, the Kwannon, in turn named after the Japanese name of the Buddhist bodhisattva of mercy.
CGI- from the first letter of Information Management Consultant in french (Conseiller en Gestion et Informatique).
Cisco- short for San Francisco . It has also been suggested that it was "CIS-co" -- Computer Information Services was the department at StanfordUniversitythat the founders worked in.
COBRA- Computadores Brasileiros, "Brazilian Computers", electronics and services company, was the first state-owned designer and producer of computers in the 1970s, later acquired by the Banco do Brasil.
Coca-Cola- Coca-Cola's name is derived from the coca leaves and kola nuts used as flavoring. Coca-Cola creator John S. Pemberton changed the 'K' of kola to 'C' for the name to look better.
Colgate-Palmolive- formed from a merger of soap manufacturers Colgate & Company and Palmolive-Peet. Peet was dropped in 1953. Colgate was named after William Colgate, an English immigrant, who set up a starch, soap and candle business in New York Cityin 1806. Palmolive was named for the two oils (Palm and Olive) used in its manufacture.
Compaq- from "comp" for computer, and "pack" to denote a small integral object; or: Compatibility And Quality; or: from the company's first product, the very compact Compaq Portable.
Comsat - an American digital telecommunications and satellite company, founded during the President Kennedy era to develop the technology. Contraction of Communications Satellites.
Daewoo- the company founder Kim Woo Chong called it Daewoo which means "Great Universe" in Korean.
Dell- named after its founder, Michael Dell. The company changed its name from Dell Computer in 2003.
DHL- the company was founded by Adrian Dalsey, Larry Hillblom , and Robert Lynn , whose last initials form the company's moniker.
eBay- Pierre Omidyar, who had created the Auction Web trading website, had formed a web consulting concern called Echo Bay Technology Group. " EchoBay" didn't refer to the town in Nevada, the nature area close to Lake Mead, or any real place. "It just sounded cool," Omidyar reportedly said. When he tried to register EchoBay.com, though, he found that Echo Bay Mines, a gold mining company, had gotten it first. So, Omidyar registered what (at the time) he thought was the second best name: eBay.com.
Epson - Epson Seiko Corporation, the Japanese printer and peripheral manufacturer, was named from "Son of Electronic Printer"
Fanta- was originally invented by Max Keith in Germanyin 1940 when World War II made it difficult to get the Coca-Cola syrup to Nazi Germany. Fanta was originally made from byproducts of cheese and jam production. The name comes from the German word for imagination (Fantasie or Phantasie), because the inventors thought that imagination was needed to taste oranges from the strange mix.
Fazer - named after its founder, Karl Fazer.
Fiat- acronym of Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino (Italian Factory of Cars of Turin).
Fuji- from the highest Japanese mountain Mount Fuji.
Google- the name is an intentional misspelling of the word googol, reflecting the company's mission to organize the immense amount of information available online.
Haier- Chinese ? "sea" and ? (a transliteration character; also means "you" in Literary Chinese)
HP- Bill Hewlett and Dave Packard tossed a coin to decide whether the company they founded would be called Hewlett-Packard or Packard-Hewlett.
Hitachi- old place name, literally "sunrise"
Honda- from the name of its founder, Soichiro Honda
Honeywell- from the name of Mark Honeywell founder of Honeywell Heating Specialty Co. It later merged with Minneapolis Heat Regulator Company and was finally called Honeywell Inc. in 1963.
Hotmail - Founder Jack Smith got the idea of accessing e-mail via the web from a computer anywhere in the world. When Sabeer Bhatia came up with the business plan for the mail service, he tried all kinds of names ending in 'mail' and finally settled for Hotmail as it included the letters "HTML" - the markup language used to write web pages. It was initially referred to as HoTMaiL with selective upper casing. (If you click on Hotmail's 'mail' tab, you will still find "HoTMaiL" in the URL.)
HSBC- The Hongkong and Shanghai Banking Corporation.
Hyundai- connotes the sense of "the present age" or "modernity" in Korean.
IBM- named by Tom Watson, an ex-employee of National Cash Register. To one-up them in all respects, he called his company International Business Machines.
ICL- abbreviation for International Computers Ltd, once the UK's largest computer company, but now a service arm of Fujitsu, of Japan.
IKON - copier company name derived from I Know One Name.
Intel- Bob Noyce and Gordon Moore initially incorporated their company as N M Electronics. Someone suggested Moore Noyce Electronics but it sounded too close to "more noise" -- not a good choice for an electronics company! Later, Integrated Electronics was proposed but it had been taken by somebody else. Then, using initial syllables from INTegrated ELectronics, Noyce and Moore came up with Intel. To avoid potential conflicts with other companies of similar names, Intel purchased the name rights for $15,000 from a company called Intelco. (Source: Intel 15 Years Corporate Anniversary Brochure)
Interland - a web hosting provider formally known as Micron Computer, Inc. which was named either after InternetLandor the combination of the largest acqusition it performed, Interliant with the word Land.
Kawasaki- from the name of its founder, Shozo Kawasaki
Kodak - Both the Kodak camera and the name were the invention of founder George Eastman . The letter "K" was a favourite with Eastman; he felt it a strong and incisive letter. He tried out various combinations of words starting and ending with "K". He saw three advantages in the name. It had the merits of a trademark word, would not be mis-pronounced and the name did not resemble anything in the art. There is a misconception that the name was chosen because of its similarity to the sound produced by the shutter of the camera.
Konica- it was earlier known as Konishiroku Kogaku. Konishiroku in turn is the short for Konishiya Rokubeiten which was the first name of the company established by Rokusaburo Sugiura in the 1850s.
Korg - Formed from the surnames of the founders, Tsutomu Katoh and Tadashi Osanai, combined with the letters "rg" from the word organ.
LG - combination of two popular Korean brands Lucky and Goldstar. (In Mexicopublicists explained the name change to the public as an abbreviation to Línea Goldstar Spanish for Goldstar Line)
L'Oréal- In 1907, Eugène Schueller, a young French chemist, developed an innovative hair-color formula. He called his improved hair dye Auréole.
Lotus Software - Mitch Kapor got the name for his company from 'The Lotus Position' or 'Padmasana'. Kapor used to be a teacher of Transcendental Meditation technique as taught by Maharishi Mahesh Yogi.
Lucent Technologies - a spin-off from AT&T, it was named Lucent (meaning "luminous" or "glowing with light") because "light as a metaphor for visionary thinking reflected the company's operating and guiding business philosophy," according to the Landor Associates staff who chose the name. Source: Design Management Journal 8:1 (Winter 1997).
Lycos- from Lycosidae, the family of wolf spiders.
Mazda Motor- from the company's first president, Jujiro Matsuda . In Japanese, no syllables are ever stressed and some inner syllables are virtually skipped. Thus, Matsuda is pronounced "Matsda". To make the name fly better outside of Japan, the spelling was changed to Mazda.
McDonald's- from the name of the brothers Dick McDonald and Mac McDonald, who founded the first McDonald 's restaurant in 1940.
Mercedes- This is the first name of the daughter of Emil Jellinek, who worked for the early Daimler company around 1900.
MGM- Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer was formed by the merger of three picture houses Metro Picture Corporation, Goldwyn Pictures Corporation and Louis B. Mayer Pictures. Goldwyn Picture Corporation in turn was named after the last names of Samuel Goldfish and Edgar and Archibald Selwyn.
Micron - computer memory producer named after the microscopic parts of its products. The official name was Micron Computer, Inc. Since, the company has become Interland, a web hosting provider, after selling/spinning off its RAM division and closing down its computer division, licensing the name. The company is now headquartered in Atlanta.
Microsoft- coined by Bill Gates to represent the company that was devoted to MICROcomputer SOFTware. Originally christened Micro-Soft, the '-' was removed later on.
midPhase- the post-dotcom era gave using the .com in a companies official name untrendy. A new dotcom company may be named traditionally, in midPhase's case it was named midPhase Services, Inc., the midPhase stands for Middle Phase, or middle of the road.
Mitsubishi - The name Mitsubishi (??) has two parts: mitsu means three and hishi (changing to bishi in the middle of the word) means water chestnut, and from here rhombus, which is reflected in the company's logo.
Motorola - Founder Paul Galvin came up with this name when his company (at the time, Galvin Manufacturing Company) started manufacturing radios for cars. Many audio equipment makers of the era used the " ola" ending for their products, most famously the "Victrola" phonograph made by the Victor Talking Machine Company. The name was meant to convey the idea of "sound" and "motion". The name became so recognized that the company later adopted it as the company name.
Mozilla Foundation - from the name of the web-browser that preceded Netscape Navigator. When Marc Andreesen , founder of Netscape, created a browser to replace the Mosaic browser, it was internally named Mozilla (Mosaic-Killer, Godzilla) by Jamie Zawinski.
MRF- Madras Rubber Factory, founded by K M Mammen Mappillai in 1946. He started with a toy balloon-manufacturing unit at Tiruvottiyur, Chennai (then called Madras). In 1952, he began manufacturing tread-rubber, and in 1961, tyres.
Nero - Nero Burning ROM named after Nero burning Rome .
Netscape- named by first marketing employee Greg Sands, in a panic when the Universityof Illinoisthreatened to sue the new company for its original name, Mosaic. Netscape then paid Landor $50,000 to design a logo.
Nike - named for the Greek goddess of victory.
Nikon - the original name was Nippon Kogaku, meaning "Japanese Optical"..
Nissan- the company was earlier known by the name Nippon Sangyo which means "Japanese industry".
Nokia- started as a wood-pulp mill, the company expanded into producing rubber products in the Finnish city of Nokia . The company later adopted the city's name.
Nortel - The Nortel Networks name came from Nortel (Northern Telecom) and Bay Networks. The company was originally spun off from the Bell Telephone Company of Canada Ltd in 1895 as Northern Electric and Manufacturing, and traded as Northern Electric from 1914 to 1976.
Novartis- after the Latin expression "novae artes" which means something like "new skills".
Oracle - Larry Ellison, Ed Oates and Bob Miner were working on a consulting project for the CIA (Central Intelligence Agency). The code name for the project was Oracle (the CIA saw this as the system to give answers to all questions or some such). The project was designed to help use the newly written SQL database language from IBM. The project eventually was terminated but they decided to finish what they started and bring it to the world. They kept the name Oracle and created the RDBMS engine. Later they changed the name of the company, Relational Technology Inc, to the name of the product.
Pepsi - Pepsi derives its name from (treatment of) dyspepsia, an intestinal ailment.
Philips - Royal Philips Electronics was founded in 1891, by brothers Gerard (the engineer) and Anton (the entrepreneur) Philips .
Qantas- From its original name, Queensland And Northern Territory Aerial Services.
Red Hat- Company founder Marc Ewing was given the Cornell lacrosse team cap (with red and white stripes) while at college by his grandfather. People would turn to him to solve their problems, and he was referred to as 'that guy in the red hat'. He lost the cap and had to search for it desperately. The manual of the beta version of Red Hat Linux had an appeal to readers to return his Red Hat if found by anyone.

Reebok- another spelling of rhebok (Pelea capreolus), an African antelope.
SAAB- founded in 1937 in Swedenas "Svenska Aeroplan aktiebolaget" (Swedish Aeroplane Company) abbreviated SAAB.
Samsonite- Samsonite was launched as a brand in 1941, receiving its name from the Biblical character Samson, renowned for his strength.
Samsung- meaning three stars in Korean.
Sanyo- The Japanese translation is disputed, although the Chinese name is "??" (literally, "Three Oceans")
SAP- "Systems, Applications, Products in Data Processing", formerly "SystemAnalyse und Programmentwicklung" (German for "System analysis and program development"), formed by 4 ex- IBM employees who used to work in the 'Systems/Applications/Projects' group of IBM.
SEGA - "Service Games of Japan" (SeGa) Founded by Marty Bromley (an American) to import pinball games to Japanfor use on American military bases.
Sharp - Japanese consumer electronics company named from its first product, an ever-sharp pencil.
Shell - Royal Dutch Shell was established in 1907, when the Royal Netherlands Petrol Society Plc. and the Shell Transport and Trading Company Ltd. merged. The Shell Transport and Trading Company Ltd. had been established at the end of the 19th century, by commercial firm Samuel & Co (founded in 1830). Samuel & Co were already successfully importing Japanese shells when they set up an oil company, so the oil company was named after the shells Samuel & Co were importing.
Siemens - founded in 1847 by Werner von Siemens and Johann Georg Halske: the company was originally called Telegraphen-Bau-Anstalt von Siemens & Halske.
Sprint- from its parent company, Southern Pacific Railroad INTernal Communications. Back in the day, pipelines and railroad tracks were the cheapest place to lay communications lines, as the right-of-way was already leased or owned.
Sun Microsystems - its founders designed their first workstation in their dorm at StanfordUniversity, and chose the name Stanford University Network for their product, hoping to sell it to the college. They didn't.
Suzuki - from the name of its founder, Michio Suzuki
Tesco - Founder Jack Cohen, who from 1919 sold groceries in the markets of the London East End, acquired a large shipment of tea from T. E. Stockwell and made new labels by using the first three letters of the supplier's name and the first two letters of his surname forming the word "TESCO".
Toshiba- was founded by the merger of consumer goods company Tokyo Denki (Tokyo Electric Co) and electrical firm Shibaura Seisaku-sho (Shibaura Engineering Works).
Toyota- from the founder's name Sakichi Toyoda. Initially called Toyeda, it was changed after a contest for a better-sounding name. The new name was written in katakana with eight strokes, a number that is considered lucky in Japan.
Unisys - made-up name for the company that resulted from the combination of two old mainframe computer companies, Burroughs and Sperry [Sperry Univac/Sperry Rand]. It "united" two incompatible ranges. Unisys was briefly the world's second-largest computer company, after IBM.
Verizon- A portmanteau of veritas (Latin for truth) and horizon.
Vodafone- is a multinational mobile phone operator with headquarters in the United Kingdom . Its name is made up of VOice, DAta, TeleFONE. Vodafone made the UK's first mobile call at a few minutes past midnight on the 1 January 1985.
Volvo- From the Latin word "volvo", which means "I roll". It was originally a name for a ball bearing being developed by SKF.
Xerox - The inventor, Chestor Carlson, named his product trying to say `dry' (as it was dry copying, markedly different from the then prevailing wet copying). The Greek root `xer' means dry.
Yahoo! - a "backronym" for Yet Another Hierarchical Officious Oracle. The word Yahoo was invented by Jonathan Swift and used in his book Gulliver's Travels.. It represents a person who is repulsive in appearance action and is barely human. Yahoo! founders David Filo and Jerry Yang selected the name because they jokingly considered themselves yahoos

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

" WAQT NAHI "

Har khushi Hai Logon Ke Daman Mein,
Par Ek Hansi Ke Liye Waqt Nahi.
Din Raat Daudti Duniya Mein,
Zindagi Ke Liye Hi Waqt Nahi.

Maa Ki Loree Ka Ehsaas To Hai,
Par Maa Ko Maa Kehne Ka Waqt Nahi.

Saare Rishton Ko To Hum Maar Chuke,
Ab Unhe Dafnane Ka Bhi Waqt Nahi.

Saare Naam Mobile Mein Hain,
Par Dosti Ke Lye Waqt Nahi.
Gairon Ki Kya Baat Karen,
Jab Apno Ke Liye Hi Waqt Nahi.

Aankhon Me Hai Neend Badee,
Par Sone Ka Waqt Nahi.
Dil Hai Ghamon Se Bhara Hua,
Par Rone Ka Bhi Waqt Nahi.

Paison ki Daud Me Aise Daude,
Ki Thakne ka Bhi Waqt Nahi.
Paraye Ehsason Ki Kya Kadr Karein,
Jab Apane Sapno Ke Liye Hi Waqt Nahi.

Tu Hi Bata E Zindagi, Iss Zindagi Ka Kya Hoga,
Ki Har Pal Marne Walon Ko,
Jeene Ke Liye Bhi Waqt Nahi.......

21 Rules of Life

1. Marry the right person. This one decision will determine 90% of your happiness or misery.*********

2. Work at something you enjoy and that's worthy of your time and talent.*********

3. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.*********

4. Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know.*********

5. Be forgiving of yourself and others.*********

6. Be generous.*********

7. Have a grateful heart.*********

8. Persistence, persistence, persistence.*********

9. Discipline yourself to save money on even the most modest salary.*********

10. Treat everyone you meet like you want to be treated.*********

11. Commit yourself to constant improvement.*********

12. Commit yourself to quality.*********

13. Understand that happiness is not based on possessions, power or prestige, but on relationship with people you love and respect.*********

14. Be loyal.*********

15. Be honest.*********

16. Be a self-starter.*********

17. Be decisive even it it means you'll sometimes be wrong.*********

18. Stop blaming others. Take responsibility for every area of your life.*********

19. Be bold and courageous. When you look back on your life, you'll regret the things you didn't do more than the ones you did.*********

20. Take good care of those you love.*********

21. Don't do anything that wouldn't make your Mom proud.

Kiss

What every kiss means
~Kiss on the stomach = I'm ready

~Kiss on the Forehead = I hope we're together forever

~Kiss on the Ear = Your my everything

~Kiss on the Cheek = You look so cute

~Kiss on the Hand = I adore you

~Kiss on the Neck = We belong together

~Kiss on the Shoulder = I want you

~Kiss on the Lips = I love you
What the gesture means...
~Holding Hands = We definitely like each other
~Slap on the butt = That's mine
~Holding on tight = I don't want to let go
~Looking into each other's Eyes = I just plain love you
~Playing with Hair = Tell me you love me
~Arms around the Waist = I love you too much to let go
~Laughing while Kissing = I am completely comfortable with you
***Advice****
Dont ask for a kiss, take one.
***If you were thinking about someone while reading this,you're definitely in Love.**

Telephone

A Writer decided to write a book about famous churches around the World.

So he bought a plane ticket and took a trip to China.

On his first day he was inside a church taking photographs when he Noticed a golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read " $10,000 per call".

The Writer, being intrigued, asked a priest who was strolling by what The telephone was used for.

The priest replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 you could talk to God.

The Writer thanked the priest and went along his way.

Next stop was in Japan. There, at a very large cathedral, he saw the Same golden telephone with the same sign under it.

He wondered if this was the same kind of telephone he saw in China and He asked a nearby nun what its purpose was.

She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 He Could talk to God.

"O.K., thank you," said the Writer.

He then traveled to Pakistan , Srilanka , Russia , Germany and France .

In every church he saw the same golden telephone with the same "$10,000 Per call" sign under it.

The Writer, upon leaving Vermont decided to travel to up to India to See if Indians had the same phone.

He arrived in India , and again, in the first church he entered, there Was the same golden telephone, but this time the sign under it read " One Rupee per call."

The Writer was surprised so he asked the priest about the sign. "Father, I've traveled all over World and I've seen this same golden Telephone in many churches. I'm told that it is a direct line to Heaven, But in the US the price was $10,000 per call.

Why is it so cheap here?"

Readers, it is your turn........
Think .....before you scroll down



The priest smiled and answered, "You're in India now, Son - it's a Local Call ".

This is the only heaven on the Earth.

Monday, December 17, 2007

Movies Related to College Life

Exam == Kalyug,
Classes == Kabhi Kabhi
Viva == Encounter
Examination Hall == Chamber of Secret
Examiner == Mrityudata
Course == GodZilla
Paper Correction == Andha Kanoon
Exam Time == Qayamat se Qayamat Tak
Question Paper == Paheli
Answer Paper == Kora Kagaz
Marks == Ashambhav
Paper Out == Plan
Cheating == Aksar
Last Exam == Independence Day
Result == Sadma
Pass == Ajooba / Chamatkar
Fail == Devdas
Vacations == Masti
Supplementary == Aakhri Rasta

Memories

Within my book of memories,
Are special thoughts of you.
And all the many nice things
You often say and do

As I turn the pages,
And recall each single thought,
I realize the happiness
That knowing you has brought.

There are memories of the times we've shared
Both bright and sunny days.
There are memories of your kindness
And your friendly thoughtful ways.

There are memories of all those notes,
we would write back and forth,
When we would just get together,
And talk of this or that.

And when I recall these memories
As I go along life's way,
I find they grow more precious still
With every passing day.

The Gift of Friendship

Running to you once again
With big tears in my eyes
You pull me close in a brotherly hug
And just let me cry

Offering me a haven
In my time of need
Means so very much more
Then you could ever see

Your friendship is the greatest gift
It abides with me always
Just knowing that you are around
Gives me the courage to stay

The smiles that you send my way
The looks that say you care
Help me through the hardest days
In a world that?s so unfair

You must think I?m crazy
Every time that I complain
That ?Someone? is being stupid
Or causing me more pain

But you have stayed right with me
I know you?ve always tried
To help me face the honest truth
When I just wanted to hide

So love and hugs I send to you
Across the many miles
And hope that I, in turn, can be
A friend that brings you smiles

Something As Simple

Something as simple as me hearing your name,
Put words in my head that I cant explain.
Back then, I wasn't really sure,
But now I see you are all I need and more.

I know we're only friends and it hurts so bad,
Because I know I'm a girl you don't wish to have.
My eyes glisten, I have butterflies flying,
Can you look at me, see how much I'm trying.


I sit and stare in your eyes, as you tell me again
Of how much you have fallen for my friend.
You leave me sad, yet I wish you'd stay,
In case I don't see you for the rest of the day.

You call me daily, asking how I am,
Inside I'm dying to say I want you as my man.
I'm not sure, exactly how long I can take,
Before my heart shatters of waiting so late.


I want to say I love you, for you to understand,
That I can no longer see us being just friends.
I'm scared to tell you baby, I don't want you to go,
So deep inside I hide my emotions so they wont show.

Every love song I hear, your name pops in my head,
So easy to feel it, so hard to be said.
Your everything I need in a man to be,
If only one day, you would love me.